Saint Crispin’s Day




St. Crispin is the patron saint of cobblers. Here’s a pair of his shoes. Nice, huh?


The world will little note, nor long remember, (thanks mister Lincoln) what shoes he made, but his day will always be covered in glory.

1415: Battle of Agincourt


Henry V was, and is, renowned as one of the greatest heroic figures in the history of Britain. In Shakespeare’s play, The bishops of Canterbury and Ely discussed the merits of the young king, saying “The strawberry grows underneath the nettle”, a reference to the subtle maturation that occurred during his irresponsible youth. This portrayal of Henry as some callow brat is disputed by some, but apparently not by the French, who disdained his leadership and his resolve. On this day, at the field of Agincourt, the French would learn the price of their hubris.

Hungry, sick and clearly overmatched, Harry the King, with what was left of his army was making for Calais, and then England, but was overtaken. Seeing the great army of France, well fed and healthy, Harry knew the odds were clearly against him. The French could see it too. The following morning, St. Crispin’s day, they set their lines of battle in anticipation of a complete, overwhelming victory.

This is the part most of us know. “We happy few, we band of brothers”. No one knows the actual words he spoke but, at least in my eyes, Shakespeare did the great man justice. Even faced with the steel clad flower of French chivalry, the courage of the lowliest English peasant did not, would not, break. Long odds or no, the English victory was complete and devastating.

“If we are mark’d to die, we are enough
To do our country loss; and if to live,
The fewer men, the greater share of honour.”

There is no telling how many times this story has raised people up from despair and helped them find their courage.


1854: The Charge of the Light Brigade


If’ you have ever said “Ours is not to reason why, ours is but to do or die” then, know it or not, you have quoted the Charge of the Light Brigade. Well done.

Alfred Lord Tennyson’s poem is a tribute to six hundred seventy courageous British soldiers (Tennyson reduced their number to six hundred for poetic purposes) at the battle of Balaclava during the Crimean war.

Whether due to miscommunication or lack of situational awareness, the Light Brigade was sent in on the point, ahead of the heavy cavalry and infantry, to drive off Russian artillery crews, who were moving their guns to another position. They weren’t.

When it became clear that the Russian artillery was not only not going anywhere, but they were locked, loaded and totally open for business, the infantry and heavy cavalry were called back. It was too late for the light brigade.

“Cannon to right of them,
Cannon to left of them,
Cannon in front of them
Volley’d and thunder’d;
Storm’d at with shot and shell,
Boldly they rode and well,
Into the jaws of Death,
Into the mouth of Hell
Rode the six hundred.”

There was no victory for the Six Hundred this day. Roughly 270 were killed or wounded for an objective they had no chance to achieve.  The Russian officers who took part in the day’s action commented in their reports about the courage of their enemies. Soldiers are good that way.

Tennyson’s poem Immortalized the Light Brigade, but their valor was met with ambivalence by the British government. This point was not lost on Rudyard Kipling, who wrote a sequel, titled “The Last of the Light Brigade”.

“There were thirty million English who talked of England’s might,
There were twenty broken troopers who lacked a bed for the night.
They had neither food nor money, they had neither service nor trade;
They were only shiftless soldiers, the last of the Light Brigade.”

That’s the unhappy end to this tale of glory. No reward for the ultimate risk, no rest from the good fight, just knowing what they and the Six Hundred did that St. Crispin’s day.


1942: Bloody Ridge, Guadalcanal


This handsome devil is PFC Harry L. Nines, United States Marine Corps.

Seven hundred Marines were stretched out pretty thin along the ridge. Most of them hadn’t slept in days but there’s no sleeping now.

The Japanese counterattack started around 1:00 AM. Heavy machine gun fire, courtesy of Sergeant John Basilone, who won the Medal of Honor, and his crews, took down a hundred or so just as they were coming out of the jungle, but then they were everywhere.

This is the part where I want to make some stuff up to tell a good story and make my grandfather a big hero, like he would ever need that.  I do know this: He was on the ridge, in a foxhole, with a rifle and, at least once, he had a visit from a Japanese soldier with a bayonet. More important than that, he survived and came home to be my grandfather.

“This story shall the good man teach his son;
And Crispin Crispian shall ne’er go by,
From this day to the ending of the world,
But we in it shall be remembered.”

May we all do so well.


Godawful Monsters/Spam and Victory: The Shop, Weaverville NC, September 15, 2018



My name is Milton.

I am here to tell you about the game but I just remembered I have to sprint to the other end of the house right now. The guy who feeds me will take over from here.


The Table


Thanks Milton, here we go. This is the 4’X6′ mat from the pic after painting. Three different shades of green dabbed on with a paper towel followed by a bit of raw umber, I think.img_20180914_232730972.jpg

I kept this stuff after an unsatisfactory outcome with a terrain project. The black stuff at the bottom is some anti-fatigue mat and the purple stuff is Yoga mat (Be sure to wash them.) Now that the introductions are out of the way, it’s time to build the hill. Do you ever watch cooking shows where they put the turkey in the oven, go to commercial and it’s done when they get back? Well, BING!

Lieutenant Washington stops by to survey the scene (Future neglected miniature submission).


The wall sections are made of clay, which I couldn’t get fired, so I put them on a cookie sheet the last time I cleaned the oven. They’re super dry and hard, but they don’t stick together all that well. No worries though, you can never have enough river rocks and/or rubble. The stockade fence and gabions came from Historicon in 2017img_20180915_141648488

The trees are from all over. I got the pine trees from a guy I used to game with. I think they came from a cake decorating website. They are just rings of foliage stacked on a wire, which makes them awesome. I cut the wires so they stick out about 3/4″ below the bottom branches, then I push them into the foam mat. They never fall over so they’re great on a slope. They’re not really big at 28mm, but they look pretty good.

Some of the deciduous trees came from my late father-in-law’s model train layout, others came from Curtis, this evening’s master of monsters. The rest I made myself from wire, floral tape and foam foliage.

Meet the Players


This is Curtis, as mentioned above, our master of Monsters. He’s an engineer, so he’s oriented toward precision and efficiency, plus he’s got a great eye for detail. He turned a handwritten list of monsters and a rectangle of graph paper into a comprehensive monster management system in about ten minutes, a big improvement to the game.


Here are Ray(Left) and Paul, the Yokel commanders. Both have been gaming hard since the seventies, as has Curtis, for that matter.  The Yokels aren’t as complicated as the monsters, so I’m looking for some help from these guys with tweaking the Yokels themselves, to refine the balance and make all the sides fun to play.


Okay, here we go. As the Yokels advance toward the village, or what’s left of it, YE GADS! By my troth ne’er have I seen the like of that before! Yep, it’s a Godawful monster all right.


Here come the reds. They incapacitated that big disgusting grub with their muskets but it was still thrashing around and nobody wanted to go finish it off so they left it. Brutal.


Here we have some yellows, including an officer, being accosted by none other than GUG! Unfortunately for our Yokel friends, Gug is about the fastest monster in the game so far, twice as fast as a man, which makes him hard to evade. The two nearest Yokels have been killed, I need some really messed up casualty markers for this game. The officer has failed to make his nerve roll, so it’s looking like Gug will be having a frozen dessert.


We had to improve the nerve roll on the yellows from 5+ to 3+ due to their bravery. Those mad, impetuous lads. They are about to attack this ankheg,. You remember him, right, AD&D Monster manual, page 1. If they can get inside, things might go their way.


Not lookin’ good, boys.


Well, the yellows got one tacked on ’em, but the reds stayed on mission and got back to tell the tale. Next time we will have some British regulars to help things along, but for now, it’s time for some Spam.img_20180915_200800196

I love Spam! I’m having Spam Spam eggs bacon and Spam.

Well, that’s this game. It’s getting better as we go along. More later, thanks for looking.

We Loved Them



Louisiana monument, Gettysburg Battlefield, Pennsylvania

I didn’t want to write this, I never did. I’m sure it will start a fight I don’t want and I won’t be surprised if it costs me some friends before it’s all over. For that I will be sorry but, whatever the price, I can remain silent no longer. Last night an angry howling mob in Chapel Hill, North Carolina perpetrated an egregious hate crime. They will say they did not, that it was for justice and to do away with our despicable racist past. It wasn’t and I’m going to tell you why. They chanted “Stand up, Fight back”. All right, I will.

First, let me say how much I sincerely admire the courage of Ms. Maya Little, the UNC student who openly defaced the statue with her own blood and faced the consequences of it, unlike the spray can commandos and the ones behind the curtains who will show you their ignorance but not their faces. Shame on every craven, cowardly one of you. Courage is a thing to be respected and I do, even the courage of my adversaries. In just the same way, cowards deserve no respect and I have none for them. Throughout my life it has been my experience that people become disdainful of things they can’t have, like my respect. They think it’s easier and safer than standing up for what they believe in, saying their piece and putting their name on it, in other words, acting like someone who deserves respect. What do you think?

There are forty thousand Silent Sams, give or take, who never came home from the war. Some are buried here in North Carolina, others were blasted into irretrievable fragments on battlefields all over the south, never to be seen or heard from again. Some are enshrined in family Bibles, their honored names bestowed upon their sons down through the generations while others, most I guess, are only remembered as part of some larger memory. No matter how their memories are honored, the bravery and fighting spirit of these men, men like you and me, is worthy of recognition and respect. It’s fine if you don’t want to believe me, I’m not here expecting to change anyone’s mind.

It is a convenient argument to say that these forty thousand, as well as the almost three hundred thousand boys and men from other states who laid down their lives, did so to preserve the institution of slavery. This is not true, and it doesn’t take years of scholarly research to see it. You just have to be willing to look at something you may not like seeing. So show some courage and take a look. I’ll respect you for it.

There were two premises that aroused the south to war: The first was slavery. True that, but it wasn’t going to be enough to get the job done. All those hardscrabble farm boys who did their own chores every day couldn’t have cared less about the problems of rich people, just like most working people today. Jeff Davis needed something to motivate all those who didn’t care, but were going, like every footsoldier in every war in history, to be called upon to do most of the dying. In other words, Silent Sam. That motivation was the Union Army, massing for an invasion that would and did bring terrible destruction to the homes and families of people all over the south. I submit to one and all that there can be no more worthy cause for a fight than the defense of one’s home and family and that, dear friend, is what Silent Sam was fighting for.

So they cast a statue and put it up on a pedestal in memory of the forty thousand, a symbol of their grief, the pain of their loss and their love. That’s right I said it: Their love. The symbolic meaning of Silent Sam, or any monument, is the meaning given to it by those who set it up and no one has the right to take that away, so I say the cowardly vandals need to check their privilege.

So now I want someone to tell me how a thing that was conceived and manifested from love can be a symbol of hate. Give up? I’m here to help. It takes a person who thinks everything is about them. It simply makes no sense to imagine the grieving mothers, wives, children and siblings of Silent Sam contemplating the downfall of their enemies while bringing this monument into being. Still this person has to believe Silent Sam represents how much these people hate him rather than how much they loved their honored dead. If you want to see more such gross naked arrogance I say you need look no further than the White House.

I love my family and you love yours and the love I bear them is no more or less precious than the love in your heart, whoever you may be. I think we could all think about this thing and gain some benefit from it.

I’m not blind, I know there is hate and injustice, I know that our country is filled with people who believe they can know someone just by looking at the color of their face. I know there is deep anger, I’m feeling it right now myself. But I’m not so angry that I will not enter into a discussion of beliefs in the spirit of good will and with an open mind.

Yes, we loved them and we love them still, the forty thousand. We carry their names and their blood, they are part of us. I will only speak for myself in this matter, though I feel certain many others share my view. When I got up this morning and saw the wretched hateful thing those bastards did, not to a piece of bronze, but to me, it was like a part of me was murdered, violently and for no reason. Regardless of this I will not hate. Hate is for weak, intellectually lazy people who prefer to view people as stereotypes rather than as human beings. What kind of person do you want to be?img_20150916_142048

North Carolina monument, Gettysburg Battlefield, Pennsylvania


Godawful Monsters test game 1



Mephiston painted by Michael Counts

Howdy folks, Mephiston here.

I wasn’t in the game yesterday evening but I watched it from the shelf with a bunch of my pals from Kenny’s wargaming hall of fame. I’ve got to say it was pretty good, more balanced than I expected.


Hall of Fame members

Welcome to the neighborhood


The mat is 4’X4′, just the right size for a 28mm intimate encounter. Captain obvious just called to remind me to say it’s made of 1/2″ interlocking play mat. I love this stuff. It takes paint beautifully, it doesn’t slide around and you can build it up from below to get a smooth terrain contour. I built this one up with an earlier experiment I called Flapjack landscaping. It’s basically cut up yoga mats. There are spaces with no support but the mat is pretty well stiff enough to span a small gap.

The little black rectangles represent open graves. These graves were not excavated from above, but undermined by, you guessed it, Godawful Monsters! The hill has been turned into a warren of tunnels and pitfalls, sort of a bit of home court advantage.

Meet the Teams


The Monsters: This font really isn’t sending the message I’m trying to put out there, but here they are anyway. They’re all reaper minis, they carry a good selection at my local game store and they’re a fair price. They make the game a bit more complicated because there are so many different ones, and they all have positive and negative characteristics but they will make the game more interesting and unpredictable as my collection grows.



The Yellow Yokels: These guys are teenage boys learning the trade, sort of. They hit on a 5 or 6, not so good, and they get one die to roll in close combat, also not so good. They pass a morale, or nerve, test on a 5 or 6, once again not so good. I guess you could say these guys are, well, not so good.


The Red Yokels: These guys are veterans. Not old campaigners, they’re farmers and such, but they’ve been in a couple of fights and they’re tough. They hit on a 4, roll 2 dice in close combat and keep their cool on a 4 as well. Much better.


The “Don’t call me a Yokel”s: Officially these guys are called Rangers and it’s OK to call ’em that. They hit on a 4, but get an extra 6″ on their range because they have rifles. They also stay frosty on a 4 and they get 3 dice in close combat. That’s why you only get two of them.

The officers vary from game to game. Their basic skills, shooting and close combat, remain the same but players roll for their leadership ability, which affects their nerve and the nerve of others near them.

The Yokel miniatures are from Galloping Major and are of excellent quality but are only available in a very limited range. The Rangers are from Warlord, also great quality and a good variety of army options.


The Battle. Well, some of it


We’re getting ready for some action here. Notice the Yokels are in a mixed unit. Smart.


Here’s Gug chasing down a couple hapless Yokels. Good times.


The Yokels are looking pretty good here, except for the fact that they are about to die a horrible death. They fought their way up to the entrance of the place they would really rather not go but that is no victory, especially since they are the only Yokels left on the board.

It’s really pretty close, closer than it looks, but the real winner is me. The game ran pretty smoothly, my wife and friends made good suggestions and asked pertinent questions, so it should be a much better game next time I run it. Anyway, there you go. Be on the lookout for Godawful Monsters vs. Roman Legionaries (Republican and Imperial), Gauls, Ancient Britons featuring Boadicea, Carthaginians and more. Thanks for stopping by.

The best thing about Digital Photography



I’ve got to say I really like digital photography. It’s easy, convenient and loads of fun. There’s no guessing how your shot came out, no waiting for developing or paying for prints you may not want. Really the list of things to like is damn near endless but, since I did title this article “The best thing about Digital Photography” it would behoove me to pick one thing and put it out there. So here it is:

The best thing about digital photography is how affordable film photography has become since the advent of the new medium.

I had to take my camera to the shop a couple weeks ago because one of the batteries leaked and made a big mess. The guy at the shop told me it would be $45.00 to remove the battery and try to get it going, but no guarantee that he could. HOWEVER, he could sell me this camera body, shown above, which is two models newer and still accepts my lenses, for only five dollars more than I would pay for the uncertain, (think doubtful) outcome. So good.

You can get your photos on a disc, which is convenient and better than a contact sheet, so I can publish them easily here or elsewhere. As you may have surmised, though, I’m interested in doing some hand made photos. There’s a community darkroom here in Asheville where you buy a membership that allows you access to their facilities as well as classes, workshops and exhibits. I haven’t joined yet but I plan to soon. And the picture of my camera? I shot it with my phone.






Hey y’all, what’s up? I am the great Cthulhu, star of the upcoming wargame “Flintlocks against the Gods or, if you prefer, Godawful monsters vs. yokels in matching coats”

The game is still out in the future a little bit, but there will be great pics and astonishing details as the story unfolds.

Photo and paint: Kenny Nines



There are lots of wargames, and more coming out every day as players construct rules systems that suit their tastes for scale, realism and game mechanics.

For most of us, the miniatures wargaming hobby is an evolution of the immortal classic “Green Army Men in the Sandbox”. The tactics and strategy become more sophisticated (sometimes) and etiquette and protocol become stringent. For instance, fielding a unit (let alone an army) of unpainted miniatures is a sign that a player has no class.

The English Civil War cavalry in the image above are 28mm, or 1:56 scale and, as you can see, are beautifully painted. There are other miniature scales, from 1:9, which is kind of big to actually play with, unless the battle scenario is something like a bar fight, all the way down to 1:6000, which works well for large scale WWII sea battles. I like 28mm, as the miniatures are large enough to show good detail, but small enough to work with the games I like to play on my table which is 5’X7’4″ when fully extended.

Photo: Kenny Nines  Paint and table: This English guy at Historicon 2017


Here’s a dirty continental soldier from the American Revolution in 28mm.

Paint and photo: Kenny Nines


This is my table, all closed up and only moderately cluttered. The large black thing hanging over the edge is my friend Archie. The things  you see underneath are supplies for creating the scene for the battle. A lot of players still like to do this the old way, making buildings and terrain features by hand but, as the hobby has grown and new technologies have developed, it has become pretty easy for any player to set up a really nice table.

Photo: Kenny Nines  Archie: Buncombe County Humane Society

Here’s a really nice table:


This is an American Civil War scenario which takes place in or near Gettysburg, PA, but isn’t exactly the battle of Gettysburg, just a little piece. It played out over two evenings, about six hours, and was very exciting. The attacking Confederates advanced bravely into heavy Union fire and the Union was no match for their cold steel. The tide was turned, however, when Union reinforcements arrived early on the Confederate left with overwhelming force. Once this happened, though the Rebels were fighting hard on the right, it was just a matter of time, so the battle was decided by both sides to have ended with a union victory.

Photos: Kenny Nines, Paint and table: Mark Cramer

This post is really nothing more than a microscopic scratch in the surface of this great hobby. There are Dwarves, aircraft carriers, Neanderthals, starships, pretty much any instance where people have a difference of opinion can be made into a wargame. What can I say? It keeps me off the streets.

In the interest of equal exposure, as well as for the benefit of Nick, here’s Milton.



Let’s try this again…

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Here’s some bee balm



and a walnut tree.


Gotta have some kitties


Let’s see if this shows up

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